The White Slate

Honesty. Such a simple word right? Most people hide behind it. The have no idea the power it has over our very existence. Many people would have a similar idea to the concept of being honest but very few actually live up to it. As I walk down the street, I see a couple having an argument, two old men leaning against a double cabin pick up, to me they appeared as if the have conquered everything that has been strewn along their path. A small boy riding his bicycle with an iPhone hooked up to his arm sleeve talking to somebody. From the looks of it, it felt like he was telling his mother that he wouldn't make it home at 8:00pm in time for dinner. I was astonished. This kid who might not be older than 7 years old is living a life I thought was way older than his years. When I was his age, I was a restless kid, always talking rapidly and talking to everyone without distinguishing between family or strangers, friend or foe. The world has changed. The advent of technology and it's existence which makes us feel starved if not given or used says a lot. 

I came about this quote from a blog saying, "I used to lie a lot. I would lie only because it was easier than explaining the truth. And I have finally grown to realize that it’s easier to [be honest]. Being honest and open has actually gotten me further than lying. My parents trust me, and I feel good about myself. And when you feel good about yourself then you know that everything is okay." We all know how a small white lie which we feel can't hurt anybody or anything over time just keeps piling and soon gets out of control. In this whole process we just tell ourselves it will soon pass. Lying to oneself is the most dangerous weapon you yourself have gone about to create. You are a ticking time bomb set to detonate the moment you find yourself in a ditch of deceit where there is no coming back no matter how much you "try" to fix the situation. 

Be honest with yourself and others. If you start lying and you get caught, it's going to be like the boy who cried wolf. Over time no one will take your word seriously even when it is a fact.It's a vicious circle. The truth might sting for some time but it's way better than the pain and hurt that soon follows a lie. You take a stance on the very own beliefs that was made to be undertaken. Be unique. Don't fall into the herd mentality. 

"If Only" STOP!!

It's not even half a day and I'm already irritated and frustrated. Why you may ask?

*Rewind*

I wake up at 6:30 am. The smell of coffee wakening my senses. The incense sticks that was lit for the morning prayers wafting and enclosing the bubble of space surrounding me. It seems after a long time I'm at a state of calmness and serenity. I wake up rejuvenated and ready for anything. I feel like I'm on top of the world. It's one of those rare moments which you just embrace and go with the flow. I get ready for work, Radio 1 station churning out tunes in the background. I'm thrilled. I'm excited. I'm restless. I hope this aura of a moment lasts the entire day. 

I reach the office at 7:30 am. The usual activities take place. Greeting my fellow colleagues, getting the devices started, arranging the desk. I glances at the messages that keep pinging my phone. I decide to ignore  it first, but later curiosity gets the better of me. Greetings. Whereabouts. Newsletters. Subscriptions. People's problems. "Ugh!!", rolling my eyes, I get to unleash the wisdom that apparently I'm supposed to inflict on people. Message after message and I'm like "Well, that was a good 1hr of serenity i got to experience." And that again started the usual pile load of mundane activities, stressing over unimportant events and just overthinking stuff which I know I have no control over. *Sigh*

I'm not a narcissist or an anti social person. I believe you say whatever is needed. Be frank and honest. You never lose anything over that. Being compassionate has always ensured and allowed the continuation of human species when faced with wars, death, extinction and any major catastrophe that has hit planet Earth. It's good to have people around to share both sorrows and happiness. Give and Take. Classic example of what it means to live. But then there are those situations where it gets too overwhelming. Your are forced or involuntarily required to deal with events that you feel is absolutely pointless. Others love to dump their problems on you. Sometimes it makes you feel content as they chose you to share this with and then most days your just the human version of a punching bag. They be like "I have to deal with this mess. Why not bring in another person to split the misery with." This is utter nonsense. You should have a distinction as to what extent can you deal with it individually or as a collective. These people need a bright red smacking signboard that yells out this message, "WAKE UP!!"

That's my rant for the day. I know you would say like don't take this to mind. Let it be and run it's course which is exactly what I did. So any of you out there who feels the same way, just know you are not alone.

Have  a great day!!

The Eye

Logs onto YouTube. Browses through the recommendations. "This looks interesting. Ohhh how to do a smoky eye. Let me watch." With vigorous enthusiasm I play the video. The beauty guru goes to to explain the products to be used. "Oh ok. I can do this." I'm still at the peak of alertness and excitement. "Ahaan. OK. An eye shadow palette. Wait!I need a primer." But she says you could also use a concealer. I'm so confused right now. Different sorts of brushes." Wait where am I supposed to get all this from?" And does a blending brush differ from the other cuticle shaped brush? This is too much information and tools. "I'm going to sit through this." Restlessness starts creeping in. "I can do this." The video goes on to show the various colors used in highlighting, smoking, blending out. And then pops the winged liner. "OMG!!I can so do that." Topped off with fake lashes and mascara. The beauty guru goes on to say how the look accentuates the eyes and can be used in various types of occasions. 

"Imma start right now."I turn up the music.Meghan Trainor's - Me Too blasting off in the bathroom. Mom yells at me to turn it down.I get all the items necessary for the look. Start of with the base color. "Ok that looks fine. Let me get the darker color." Nervous giggles erupt from within my very core. Blend. Blend. Blend. "That doesn't look bad" But I know how it looked, I was in a state of transformation into a zombie or achieving Edward Norton's eyes from The Fight Club. I take my liquid liner. *deep breaths*. I start from the center and make my way outwards. A flick. *pause* Left eye looks ok. Let me try the right one. Flick*pause* They both look like a pair of siblings who hate each other. *drops of dread sets in* "I'll just extend the other line again." The dance continues. "Gosh it's so hot. Who turned down the AC." No sooner had I done it, I look into the mirror and see a distressed raccoon-human hybrid staring back at me. 

What is this atrocity? I start contemplating on my life and where I have gone wrong. My self esteem has dropped 20 floors down the building. I stare into the mirror, the remnants of what I used to be. I saw a hint of myself peeking back through the eyes, glistening with tears of an unknown emotion. My blood starts to boil. I see the lips in the mirror attaining a feral growl, building deep inside my chest. I wash my face. How idiotic of me, assuming water is going to take off everything. I look into the mirror again. My untamed hair looking wild around my face (most days I could pull off the wild hair with sass but not today).The raccoon has now turned into the ghost: Kayako Saeki from The Grudge. At least my feelings are in tune with the look. A scrubbed face devoid of all the drama that occurred over the last hour vanished. I stare at my chubby face. "I look better like this. Who needs makeup." I put on my spectacles, grab a book from the bookshelf, settle down in the black armchair which my mom frequently tells me has merged and become one with my posterior much to her disappointment and irritation, and proceed daydreaming to a different world of expeditions and evil curses coming to life and infecting everyone.   

First Time for everything right!!

Hola amigos and chicas. Already have two blogs out there. Started this one cos the seminar conducted in college demanded it. 

So my name is Sheekha Girish, born and raised in Abu Dhabi. My native origins are from this upcoming,booming,soon to be city called Kannur in Kerala,India. I do have my roots from Gujarat and If you are an Indian, no I'm not half Gujarati half Malayali, just that my dad's side of the family has been in Ahmedabad before India got independence and well we currently have the 3rd generation who were born there.I'm a TV fanatic, a bookworm,  I listen to Hip Hop and R&B which when I tell people leads to them raising their eyebrows and going like "What do you mean?". And I would be like don't judge a book by it's cover and the whole defending the stereotype battle goes down. Most times I emerge victorious.I did have a previous blog which was up and running till 2016 June after which it just refused to open (Maybe I was shut out).So here I am. In this new domain. I'm not restricting myself to just one category of things. There's gonna be music, TV shows, movies, general topics and loads of awesomeness in store. So I won't tell you to sit back and relax because One: That is cliche and Second: You might not even be interested or eventually get bored. But for now Hop on board.

Will keep you posted.